The Rejection Trigger of Obsession:
Rejection is Primal
Think of how much the amygdala is being stroked when you’re out alone, especially after being cast out from a group. You can feel the difference. You rip out from comfort to primal separation. A gently loved body being stroked by the womb of a group. Then, you suddenly face having to adapt.
There is a fierce change, a lack of control, and a loss of comfort.
Your amygdala is all types of signaling out of the fear you tell it to have, mentally dripping thoughts down into it. This stimulation is meant to make you survive. If you were out in the wild this fear would heighten your senses to where you notice every moment of a predator coming for you. Your senses are sporadic and searching.
In real life there is nothing to fight. There is nothing to release all of those primal juices and there is no company that wants to make you into their latest blissjuice line.
Actually I would sell that. Primal Juice. It would be mood color changing.
In real life we receive rejection from work, from nonverbal signals of other humans who don’t open the door from us, from relationships, from family and from friends. This rejection truly hurts because it is signaled to hurt.
This rejection leads into all types of maladaption. We wind up not knowing how to cope with this rejection and cling to what we lost. We obsess. We obsess over the idea of love (comfort of the group/another human to make us feel safe), and the compulsion is obsessive thoughts over the human. This obsession could also rebound into continual need for another human (ever heard of the rebound?).
Where these obsessive thoughts become a havoc is if that other human does not want you. Many humans might actually deal with obsession and be ‘in love’. This is the unhealthy version that people see as ‘clingy’ or ‘needy’. The humans are in love and married, but there is still a level of ‘needing’ the other person to survive. Without them you feel alone and helpless. You have not adapted to life. You are simply supplementing self adaptation with another human.
I am not applying a good or bad adaptation. A base, a comfort, a human or animal to keep you feeling safe is a glorious thing. If you do not have this, or you deal with obsession, then these words might help in explaining why in every silence a human is drooled into your mind.
I know you are used to seeing words about rejection, but it is the thing this mind struggles most with. In that regard it might actually be one of the hardest mental illnesses to overcome, or it might just be the one most deeply embedded within me. Rejection is a deep moment in childhood that I have not fully dealt with as it is hard to reach.
Also drink tea today. It’s a tea feeling day.